When I talk about love

Love happens the way do not imagine. It comes to our life, make us blind about everything and go. When I talk about love, I think of the dusty roads of the city where we walked together for the first time.

With every single step, we try to know each other. Love does not teach us to judge but to know from the heart. Love teaches us to move and not to hold back. Love is that sound which you often forget to hear but when it comes, it leads you out of this world. Everbody in this world are suffering in their own way when love comes to us is does not talk about suffering but teaches us to enjoy every moment.

My kind of love is madness. If there is no madness that is not loving. Love cannot be rational because something irrational is magical. People often forget that love is not about the craving to be together. But it is just staying the real self around the person you love. I remember the first time held her hands to cross a road of the city. Love is about that first touch. After that, I have touched her many more times but that adventure was not there.

We do not want to feel the love but want to realize that we are needed somewhere. We can die alone but not without love. Every day we love the person more and more. If we try to forget someone, it is just that we are keeping the person in a special room. Love is not about forgetting but to cherish the memories. If I ever meet her in my life, I might not want to hug her but to follow her gaze. When I talk about love, I talk about memories. Love makes the best memories of our life. Forcing us to forget love is denying to stay with the best of the memories. When I talk about love, I think of the silence between us and not the moans.

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Love and let love: 60% break-ups happen due to trust issues

They were best of friends. They were the perfect couple, people said. They loved each other like there was no tomorrow.

The breakup of Utsav and Ankita (name changed) was unexpected because they always had the bond we look for. Then why did it happen? The relationship ended because of trust issues. A recent survey by the Cosmopolitan website observed that 66% breakups happen due to issues related to trust.

The fast life, social media, stress and many other issues are creating a mess in the relationships. Let us first understand what is trust in a relationship. According to various researchers, it is defined as Trusting someone means that you think they are reliable, you have confidence in them and you feel safe with them physically and emotionally. Trust is something that two people in a relationship can build together when they decide to trust each other.

Following this definition, we see that love is something which is built over time. The psychologists of this time opined that this trust is fading away from the relationships slowly. Now, we should also remember that trust issues are not confined to cheating. The breaking of trust can happen in a various way like lying, avoiding, lack of dependability and much more.

The recent researches also showed that 65% of couples suffer from problems in communication. They fail to communicate their feelings and situations. The reports also suggest that 43% couples fail to resolve their conflicts. All these have a direct or indirect connection with trust.

Significantly we get another data that 83% social experts say that women face a problem of invalidation of their stands. These factors assert the point that due to lack of communication couples are losing the trust.

After looking at this fact we should start working on building up the trust. It can be done through open communications, focusing on friendship than the overdose of sex. Trying to understand the person and not assuming anything. With time, the mutual communication and initiatives can make life much better for the couples.

 

Jantar Mantar protest ban: Varun Seth’s right to privacy Vs voice of democracy

On Thursday evening after the National Green Tribunal (NGT) gave the order to stop all the protests in Jantar Mantar; India witnessed a very rare contradiction. This contradiction, we should not ignore because as far as the case is the concern, it was a petition filed by a residence of Jantar Mantar area Varun Seth with some others against the protests as these were affecting their personal life.

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(Source: Google)

“They come in numbers, create havoc with slogans, walk around semi-nude, urinate on walls, and leave behind a mess… obviously, I want them out of here,” said Varun Seth to Indian Express. The Indian Express also wrote: Seated inside his palatial one-acre property at 6 Jantar Mantar, Seth told The Indian Express about the “worst last five years living on this street”, and his efforts to rid the street of protesters, which he began four years ago. “I filed a case with NGT but no one else supported me — Kerala House, Delhi Metro office, the building next door… everyone refused. It was just us and 5 Jantar Mantar. In 2015, we got an instrument to measure noise here, to show NGT the problem we face,” he said.

 

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Varun Seth the petitioner. (Source: Indian Express)

This is a very different kind of contradiction following which we should raise some questions. There is undoubtedly no question that Jantar Mantar is the protest square of India and it is the voice of democracy. Every day, a large number of people come and gather at this place with their demands. There is a large number of permanent protestors too, who all are protesting for years. The ban on the protest here would stop the democratic voice and at this stage of India, these voices are very crucial.

Explaining the issue, I also want to say that Jantar Mantar is an example to the whole world that how democracy should allow all kinds of protests. Indian decided this place so that the whole city does not get affected due to the protests. Being the Capital of India, Delhi was supposed to be the centre of all political movements.

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Protest at Jantar Mantar (Source: Google)

Now, let’s think of the concern of Seth. Is not he has the right to live his life peacefully? Isn’t it is true that being a resident of Jantar Mantar he cannot avoid protest?

I also think that we should not see in the perspective of NGT that it is against the protest but to see the contradiction. I hope the government and NGT will reconsider the matter and decide some option. I also think that the agencies and use should cooperate with the Mr Seth to maintain his rights. Democracy is for him and for us too. With all my wishes, I just hope that our country will not lose its voice of protest.

Durga puja, down the memory lane

It was 10 PM in Delhi and it was a Sashti, the first day of the Durga Puja. The roads of the capital were mostly emptied, the shops were closed, some of the bikers with high sound bullets were passing by the lanes of Mayur Vihar. I was returning to my rented room in the city.

The smell of the autumn took me down the memory lanes. What is pujo to me? I have spent my childhood in the Dhakuria of the south Kolkata. I stayed with my family at Babubagan. Just leaving a house there was a field where one the most popular Durga puja was organised. That puja still happens at the same place. To me, pujo is not only about the four-five days of the celebrations but also the time of preparation of this occasion.

I remember that every day while coming back from the school clad in my school uniform I used to visit the pandal to see the making. The smell of the pandal was something I remember till today. There were a group of people who used to come every year to make the panda. They used to camp beside the pandal and stayed there for two-three months. I used to go the camps to see them and chit chat about random topics regarding the festival and the making of the pandal. I had seen their families, their children and their life.

My pujo was all about these small things. Today, when I stay far from the city and try to look back, I find that those days were the most special days I ever had. Pujo to me was all about people, meeting friends, going out to hop the pandals and enjoy a freedom. Yes, pujo was a freedom to me. It was the time when nobody would hold me back or nobody would ask me to return early. Those days were like a dream.

Then I grew up. The days changed. The time of Maddox Square entered my life and became a part of my pujo. The long chats, meeting friends, listening to bands, dancing at the beats, everything in those days was special. Pujo helped me to know the city more. It has always been very close to my heart and will always be.

 

 

The Last Time

The last time we kissed was an evening

It was gone in a moment.

When I look back today, it was a touch

of a glorious life.

When I gaze with the wistful eyes,

you come sometime, sit with me.

Talk to me for hours.

I know life changes,

but the last time we kissed

it was an evening, which never came again,

 

আমার থামতে শেখা

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নতুন জীবনের প্রভাবে বাংলা লেখার অভ্যেসটা ক্রমশ কমে গিয়েছে | এমন একটা সময় এসে দাঁড়িয়েছি যেখানে ইঙরাজি ভাষাটা লিখলে পাঠকরা খুশী হয়না, আর বাংলাতে নিজে লিখেতে ভরসা পাই না | কিন্তু তবুও আমার ছোটবেলাতে শেখা আমার এই ভাষা আমার সব থেকে কাছের |

আজ নিজেকে অনেকগুলো প্রশ্ন করতে ইচ্ছে করে। ইচ্ছে করে জিজ্ঞেস করতে যে আমার ভাষা কি? জখন বার বার শুনি যে আমার ভাষা তে ব্যাক্ত কথার মানে বোঝা যায় না তখন একটা অদ্ভুত কষ্ট গ্রাস করে নিজেকে। বোঝাতে পারিনা সেই ব্যাথার যন্ত্রণাটা।

পথ চলতে চলতে যখন থামতে হয়, সেই মুহূর্ত খুব কঠিন। আমরা কেউ কখনো থামতে চাই না। আমরা চাই যে পথ যাতে কখনও না শেষ হয়। আমার ক্লান্ত পথ আমায় শিখিয়েছে প্রতিবার হেরে গিয়ে কিভাবে জেতার জন্য লড়তে হয়।

পথ হারিয়েছে পথের ভাবনায়, আমি চলেছি আমার স্বপ্নে। পৃথিবীর সমস্ত আলো এক জায়গায় এসে যেখানে থেমে যায় সেখানে, রাত্রি আসে। রাত্রি আসে চুপি চুপি। যখন আমার শহরের ক্লান্ত গাছগুলো নিজেকে প্রকাশ করতে ভয় পায়, তখন সে আসে। হাতে হাত রেখে বলে বাঁচার কথা।

জীবন মানে শূন্যতা নয়, তবে ভয় নিয়ে আসে তাকে। আমরা প্রতি মুহূর্তে আকাশের দিকে তাকাতে ভয় পাই। আকাশ যেন সব উত্তর জানে। আমারা জানতে চাই না সেই উত্তর তবে শুধু খুঁজে যেতে চাই। শহরের যে নরম গন্ধ আমায় চিনিয়েছে জীবন। সেই গন্ধকে আজ আমি লুকিয়ে রাখতে পারি না আর।

মৃত্যূর কাছে হার মানি না আমরা। পৃথিবীর সব স্তব্ধতা পেরিয়ে আমাদের কান্না পৌঁছায় না কোথাও। তবে কি আমরা কাঁদতে ভুলে যাচ্ছি নাকি কান্না লুকিয়ে রাখছি। ভাবতে গেলে থামতে হয়। আমার থামতে শেখা নিজেকে হারানোর জন্য নয়, খুঁজে নেওয়ার জন্য।